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Attila the Pun
Thursday, April 15, 2004
 
What do we want? Limp wristed bitch slaps!

Tim Blair has pointed out a bold plan by the saddam lovers over at indymedia - if any pro-liberation people (characterised generally as young Liberals) turn up at a pro-saddam rally, then 'gilberts' immediate reaction was to:

"charge at these bastards and try to smash thier placards and hurt them as much as possible" and that "In the ideal situation Young Liberals should be left bruised, bashed and bleeding if they dare show thier face at a rally like that."

Now ignoring the irony in the feelings of the so called 'peace protestors' wanting to beat up someone, i would like to consider the actual likelihood of it happening.

I went to university with Gilbert types and young Liberal types. Using broad stereotypes (which become stereotypes for a reason), who would win a punch on between the two?

Your average Gilbert type was badly dressed (a kaftan and rasta hat would be a liability in a fight, as would dreadlocks), underfed (vegans take dietary supplements for a reason) and physically rather puny (sport being all horrible and competitive)

Young Liberals are harder to stereotype. There are certainly plenty of the nerdy mummy boy types, but there are also plenty of the arrogant-private school-played-for-the-first-rugby-XV-types as well. Fed on a healthy diet of red meat, dressed in RM Williams and moleskins, they would hand Gilbert his spotty pinko ass in a fight. (As an aside - Tony Abbott was a heavy weight boxer at university, care to take him on at a demo?)

People like Gilbert get an over inflated sense of their own power by marching around in packs, yelling angry slogans, and occasionally trying to antagonise Police in the full knowlege that the cops can's nightstick the living crap out of them on national television.

Gilbert actually touches on this point, stating that:

"Who cares if the news portrays the protest as violent; they do it anyway, and when they are not violent they don't report them at all. If it looks that way on the TV it just means we look more serious and frankly, it makes us more likely to win our demands."

Sure buddy - which demands are they? Is Bush going to reinstall Saddam because some unemployed hippies in Melbourne attacked some Young Liberals? Is Nelson going to reverse the HECS legislation because you threatened to stink up the university admin building for a few days? Try jumping on the next boat to reality pal.

In a somewhat comforting development, even Gilbert's fellow travellers give him a pasting over this in comments. They range from ironic:

"I bet you call them "fascists", don't you?"

To the one I was going to post till i was beaten to it:

"Come see the violence inherent in the system!"


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